Dogs in schoolgirl uniforms are just the tip of the iceberg
In the land with the most rapidly shrinking birthrate in the world, it’s easy to see where all that energy is going…
Now it’s the dogs that are wearing schoolgirl uniforms
And aspiring to work at maid cafes
They’ve settled the issue of how dogs should wear pants
And what they should be for Halloween
And they can even dress up like their favorite movie characters
Doggie wedding gowns and tuxes are definitely a Thing (whether for their own nuptial bliss or their owner’s, nobody’s saying)
And even the dreaded Cone of Shame need not embarrass a pet in public anymore
Naturally, there are salons that specialize in cut, color and extensions
And furniture makers that sell tiny sofas for pets to recline upon (or, more likely, for you to sit on while they occupy yours)
For dogs that would prefer that YOU do the walking on the daily constitutional, there are pet strollers (including this stealth assault version)
And pets who need a little help getting around can get a fashionable assist while giving an alt-Pilates core strengthening to their owners
If Fifi gets peckish while out and about, a stop at the local pet store’s “deli” offers a selection of tastefully styled dog food combos
Unless you’re really a glutton for punishment, in which case you can subscribe to magazines that have recipes for getting up at 5:00 am with your tweezers and veggie cutter to craft custom doggie bento-boxes
And if all those fine meals are putting on an extra pound or two, the Petite Dog Resort Joker offers doggie swimming lessons and treadmill time
Followed, of course, by a relaxing shower
And a soak in the dog-sized hot spring bath
The perfect gift for a doting pet owner: a custom-painted lucky cat figure made from a photo of their beloved Mittens
Or a cuddly life-sized felted doppleganger
If Fluffikins should accidentally go walkabout, there’s a shrine dedicated to lost cats where you can pray for its safe return
And amulets blessed by the local Shinto deities begging divine protection from all manner of animal calamities
And finally, no New Year’s celebration would be complete without the annual trek to have the faithful animal companion blessed at the local shrine (wearing traditional kimono for the occasion, of course!)
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